My story for #MentalHealthAwarenessWeek. 🗣️ 🙌🏻
In 2021 I shared with you all my personal mental health journey and here it is again with a few little updates ☺️
Wow can you actually believe it’s May 2023? I still feel like the last 3 years have been a bit of a crazy blur ! And now time seems to be going super quick !
Lockdown 1.0, 2.0 and 3.0 has changed people’s life’s forever and has definitely changed mine! It pushed my own mental health to the limit 🧠.
When I look back at old messages and images of how I was 3 years ago I have completely changed and gone from a once negative super anxious person to one of those people who is super positive about absolutely anything and sees the best in everything. Don’t get me wrong I still have bad days and have to push myself to positive which can feel like a battle between myself in my head.
The aim of this post is to raise awareness and know that mental health can be very hard to see but it can be heard- and speaking out is by the far the best thing you can do.
Over the last couple of years I have learnt that we are our own worst enemies and It’s easy to be hard on yourself when you’re anxious . The thing is, being nasty to yourself doesn’t make anything better, it only makes you feel even more stressed. 🙇🏻♂️
I have learnt that our mental health must come first, you are a PRIORITY! The first thing I do in the morning is Prioritise my own mental health! I meditate, visualize what I would like my day to be like and go an my @The secret app – ( best app ever) and do my gratitude and affirmations and I read normally a self help book or some research to do with work : ) This instantly puts me in the right frame of mind to start the day ! I also exercise this may not be at the start of the day but exercising really makes me feel a million times better if I’m feeling a bit anxious or overwhelmed.
You must take that time for you! Right now just rest, watch tv, have a bath, go for a walk , be kind to yourself and know that it is okay to need a break ❤️🙌🏻🌟🌾
So here’s my story…….
If you know me now or actually even if you knew me a couple of years back you would think I was a super confident, bubbly young woman. However that was very far from the truth.
I suffered with anxiety and depression and it ruled my life !! It affected my everyday activities, family life, finances and friendships 😔
Anxiety seems like such a buzz word but it’s REAL and it’s crippling that feeling of your stomach tightening, your throat closing up and that overwhelming feeling of worry about everything in your life that makes you feel like your not good enough, you can’t do enough is paralysing. The strength of putting on a brave face and acting like your ok because that’s what we feel like is the right thing to do.
For me anxiety plagued me it gave me negative thoughts day and day out and I felt like I was stuck in this deep dark whole that had no return.
Anxiety it’s a word that has been around me for a few years and one that I hated to be associated with. I don’t have anxiety I used to say there’s something wrong with me but I don’t know what it is.
Back in 2016 Originally when my symptoms started I had this pain in my stomach this tightening and this lump in my throat
I was adamant I had a stomach problem and had loads of test and procedures which ruled anything serious out.
At the time I wasn’t happy in a few aspects of my life and my mind was fulled with negative thoughts from others and myself on a daily basis.
After many many tests and chats with my doctors they diagnosed me with anxiety and started me on anti depressants along with anxiety medication to lower my heart rate and blood pressure. They also advised CBT.
When lockdown hit, my mental health plummeted, not only was I trying to be a good mum to a 2 year old and keep her happy and entertained my relationship which hadn’t been right for a couple of years had come to an end, financially I had zero money, no support, no government grants, my anxiety was at an all time high.
- How would I make money ?
- Would I get clients back ?
- Can I afford to keep my business ?
- Can I afford to keep my house ?
- Is there anyway out of this?
I was now a single mum , with no income and a little one to look after.
The negative thoughts were raging around my head ! I wasn’t a good mum, my business will end. I will never have any money, I will loose the house! Everyone will be better off without you.
I knew I had 2 choices –
– Let the anxiety win or step up and
– Make my situation work.
So what did I do I know I needed to get these negative thoughts out of my head so I started to exercise everyday this instantly made me feel better
I spoke out , I reached out to a couple of my closest friends and talked to them everyday on the phone
Meditation I meditated for even just 5 minutes helped calm me
I started being grateful for all the things I had in my life – my family, my friends, the weather etc
I started affirmations !
”I am strong, I am confident, I am happy , I make loads of money it comes easily and freely into my life, I can achieve anything”
After a while I felt free. Like I was killing off my anxiety and becoming me again. I came off my medication ( please don’t do this without advise from a doctor)and started to feel motivated to make my life work.
Now I needed to make money so I did ! I wasn’t working at the time so I pushed myself into helping patients with their face and skin concerns and made a full time wage booking patients in for treatments and assisting them
with medical grade skincare .
And here I am 2 years on still here, still fighting the anxiety as and
when it creeps it’s ugly head I found after loosing my dad it came back worse than ever ! This led me to become very emotionally detached wanting to stay in and not see anyone and led me down a path of of emotionally eating I put on just over a stone and a half and went from a size 10-14 ! ( I will get more into my weight journey over the next month or so) i am so so grateful to be here and that my anxiety won’t win.
I did that !
Yes I have had help, chatted to friends and family and had therapy.
So Just a friendly reminder for anyone who has been struggling lately.
You got this !!!
Anxiety is REAL and can be a very hard thing for some people to understand especially if they have never had it.
But I understand! I get it !!!
My job is never just about making you feel better on the outside it’s always about making you feel better on the inside and I am here for all of my clients with any aspect of your mental health you want to talk about !
I’m here and I’m listening ! 🥰✨